The past is the past.......

I'm thinking again.... a lot about my past. I'm trying to say to myself that "The Past is IN the Past" but I can't. It's really hard to forget about everything what happend especially when You see pictures other people. I'm between two different words and don't know which choose. America or Poland...Poland or America. Poland - country where I was growing up, where is my family and friends, country where I have most of my memories or maybe America - country where I grow up as an adult, where I'm learning everyday to be independent and I'm trying to find something. Few months ago when I came first time to America I wanted to sing "This is real this is me, I'm exactly where I suposed to be now.....". Then I was a girl who just wanted to sing "I don't know what I want so don't ask me cause I'm still trying figure it out....". Today I know who I want to be, where I want to live but it's so hard to say your family that you don't want to go back. It's not like I don't love them. I really do but I need to live my life and I know that if I'll go back there I won't find work. I have here so many opportunities and I'll find job here, but first I need to find husband..... Now.... Please all of you don't think that I just want to find husband to stay here because it's not the point. If I won't stay here it's like wasn't meant to be....

Ok I'm going back to my topic :P.... I just saw picture of my ex-boyfriend with his new girlfriend. Few days ago I also saw picture of......... with his girlfriend....... I'm just like..... It could be me with them on this photos but I chose different....."I'm gonna find someone someday, Who might actually treat me well. This is a big world, that was a small town...." I just can't stop thinking about it.....